rina_dives: (Default)
Mission 1: Ordellya's Untimely End (Harry Potter)

Mission 2: Lord Potter and the Barking Owl (Harry Potter)

Mission 3: The Sue of Many Names (Ranger's Apprentice)

Mission 4: A Stint Into WhatThe (Harry Potter)

Mission 5: When Stus Stalk Sues (Harry Potter)

Enter Badfic (RWBY; Written by TheShyIon)

Mission 6: Retribution (Harry Potter)

Mission 7: My Inner Life (Legend of Zelda)

Interlude 1: Flamingos (With Doc and Vania Tolluk)

Mission 8: The Lost Land (My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic; With Marvin Jones and Printworthy)

Interlude 2: Suppertime Stories (With Falchion and Rayner Blitzkrieg)

Mission 9: An Act of Sheer Will (Pokémon; With Falchion and Velociripper)

Interlude 3: Zeb

Mission 10: He Was Practically Asking For It (Percy Jackson and the Olympians)

Mission 11: Back Into WhatThe (Harry Potter)

Mission 12: Rose Potter Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6 (Harry Potter)

Interlude 4: Fate Amenable to Change (With the Notary, Wobbles the Clown, Desdendelle, and the Librarian)

Interlude 5: I Need a Freaking Drink (With William Marshall)

Mission 13: Two Sues for the Price of One (Doctor Who)

Mission 14: Now This is Deliberate (Doctor Who)

Mission 15: (In progress; cowrite with Neshomeh)

Mission 16: Misophist (Doctor Who/Harry Potter; With Desdendelle and the Librarian)

Mission 17: Completely Mistaken (Lord of the Rings/Inheritance Cycle; With the Reader and Kozar)

Mission 18: But is She Goffik? (Harry Potter)

Mission 19: Screw Loose (PPC Badfic; With the Librarian)

Mission 20: (In progress; cowrite with Scapegrace)

Mission 21: So Much for Subtlety (Harry Potter; With Desdendelle, the Librarian, and Corolla)

Mission 22: Of Stus Gone By (My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic; With Valon Vance and Kala Jeng)

Mission 23: Avatar According to Sue (Avatar: The Last Airbender)

Mission 24: Sue-tably Unimpressed (Percy Jackson and the Olympians)

Mission 25: Rassilon's Little Brat (Doctor Who)

Mission 26: That Explains a Lot (Doctor Who)

Mission 27: Once Bitten, Twice Shy (Pirates of the Caribbean)

Other Stories

Continuity: Gallifrey Shrinks

Ten Years Hence: The Aviator and Zeb
rina_dives: Tektek avatar (Second Rina)
So Zeb and I just got back from our first mission after Rose Potter.

Wait. I should probably go back and explain a bit.

Yeah, Zeb and I got sent into that beast of a badfic, and we somehow managed to kill all six incarnations of Rose. It wasn't fun, but we did it. Things were going smoothly enough until the very end, when Rose caught us off-guard and nearly killed us both. And I guess she kind of did kill me. I don't really want to talk about it, but I probably ought to unless I want to bottle it all in.

Basically, I took a Puncturing Curse to the stomach and was about to die when Zeb got the brilliant idea to turn me into a Time Lord so I could regenerate. Do you have any idea how freaking painful that is? I could feel my bones reshaping! And the aftereffects weren't exactly fun, either. It was like being alternately hyped up on laughing gas and feeling like I was about to fall over and throw up. Not fun. Not fun at all.

By the way, I want to make it very clear to anyone from the Multiverse Monitor who might stumble upon this that I did not destroy Gryffindor tower, and that we had a plan to take Rose down, thank you very much.


So yeah, not even a day after regenerating, the Flowers sent me and Zeb out on another mission into— you guessed it— Doctor Who. There's no way that was unintentional, especially since right after taking down the Sue, we were sent right back out into more Doctor Who, with a Sue who was practically identical to the other! Ugh. At least it was another easy mission. I don't know what I'd do if they sent us into something ridiculous.

So that's kind of all the time I have for today; I'm trying to catch up on canons since for some reason, my memories didn't all copy over properly. I'm having to reread Harry Potter, can you freaking believe that?? I mean, at least now I hopefully won't be forgetting canon (perfect recall, woohoo...), but now I'm going to have to live with all the badfic we run into— and I can't get the memory of bleeding out on the floor with a hole ripped through my stomach out of my head. It's all I see at night when I dream.

Zeb keeps telling me I ought to go to FicPsych, but you couldn't get me in there on threat of losing my first vacation. No way, no how, no thank you.

Zeb here.

Apr. 11th, 2015 07:36 am
rina_dives: (Zeb)
I'm not really sure what I'm supposed to do here. My partner says it's a 'journal' where she writes her thoughts. It seems rather bare to me, but I suppose I'm not the best person to judge.

Maybe I should start with the basics. My name is Zeb. No last name, just Zeb. I'm a Pokémon, a Luxray to be specific. Well, I'm not at the moment. Rina (my partner) put me through the Disguise Generator so I could type this, since paws don't go very well with keyboards. It's not my first time being human, though I'm still getting used to the lack of fur. And the two legs, though Rina says I learned to walk pretty fast. I'm not so sure; two legs feels like such a bad "evolutionary" design.

That is what I am told is a 'pun'. Rina seems rather fond of them, but when I showed her this, she just groaned and did a thing humans call 'facepalming'. Maybe there's a secret to them I don't yet know.

Being here in the PPC is rather overwhelming. In the last twenty-four hours, I learned how to walk on two legs, traveled to a different world, and saw firsthand what these creatures called Sues and Stus are capable of doing. Nurse Jenni assures me things will get better with time, though I am not so sure. Headquarters alone reminds me of a cave, and I don't like it. The last memory I have of a cave is dying in one.

I don't know how I am still alive right now, but I'm thankful I am. And I intend to make the best of this second chance offered to me. In the meantime, I have been told by Nurse Jenni (a very lovely person, as humans go) to inquire after one Ilraen in RC 999. She says he might be able to help me adjust. And Arceus knows I could use it. I'm certainly out of my element.

Rina says this is a slightly better pun than the last. I will keep trying.
rina_dives: Tektek avatar (First Rina)
Okay, maybe not a lot, but definitely something big.

It's been lonely without Randa lately, but I didn't think I would get a new partner this fast. His name's Zeb and he's a Luxray- a Luxray I had in a Pokémon Diamond Nuzlocke- and he thinks he's dead. Or is? I don't know, and I don't think at this point he does, either.

Crap, I'm going to have to tell him about his origins sometime, aren't I? Yikes, I hope he doesn't hate me when he finds out it's kinda my fault he's suffering major PTSD. Poor guy. He's currently in FicPsych, and I don't know when he'll be out. Until then, it looks like I have an impromptu vacation. I just wish it had been under better circumstances.

I think I'll head to Rudi's, I could use some hot chocolate. And company, that would be nice.
rina_dives: Tektek avatar (First Rina)
So, Randa and I just got back from a back-to-back mission and it was horrible. The second one was practically Legendary, but that's not what I'm talking about. No, I'm talking about my old badfic.

It was... well, it was painful, to say the least. I think Randa and I counted eleven or twelve mini-Aragogs by the time we killed my old Sue, but there were all sorts of character ruptures and grammar screwups and blatant Sueism and UGH. Maybe I'll try to find a Time Lord agent who'd be willing to let me borrow their TARDIS and go back in time to prevent myself from ever writing that fic... But then again, if I'd never written it, I'd never have grown as a writer to find out that what I was doing was atrocious. And I did get to kill the Sue myself, which was a plus.

It was really weird, though, since she looked almost exactly like me as a kid. Randa, if you're reading this, don't you dare say a word. Actually, if you're reading this, I'll murder you in your sleep, but whatever.

Of course, the second badfic was "My Inner Life", and I think my brain is quite thoroughly frazzled from that. I'm really not happy with Randa right now. She'd swallowed an entire bottle of Bleeprin by the time we finished the mission, and I know nothing about freaking Legend of Zelda. Still, knowing nothing about a continuum is one thing, but having to watch people doing the nasty is not what I signed up for when I joined the DMS. Randa has some weird fascination with it, so good for her.

I've never wished so much in my life that I could take Bleeprin. I could really use some right now.
rina_dives: Tektek avatar (First Rina)
I just finished typing up our most recent (as in, our first!) mission report and I can feel that headache coming back.

Why do I have a headache in the first place?

Randa hit me over the head with her freaking steel yo-yo, that's why.

I mean, yeah, I was kind of flipping out over something our Sue did, but was knocking me out really necessary? Ugh. I could use some Bleeprin right now. I've heard that stuff is like magic here.

...okay, now I'm really mad.

One task. ONE. TASK. I only asked Randa to pick up some Bleeprin while I was hammering out contract details with the SO and she got lost in the hallways. It's lucky I ran into her on my way back to the RC, because she forgot you weren't supposed to think about your destination.

I guess the Bleeprin will have to wait.
rina_dives: Tektek avatar (First Rina)
I never thought anything like this was possible, but oh man, was I wrong.

I had just finished getting dressed for school when the most unexpected thing happened: a hole opened up in the middle of my bedroom right below me and I fell in, only to find myself in the middle of a cafeteria that looked like its inhabitants stepped out of the Mos Eisley Cantina (funnily enough, it turns out a few of them actually did).

It was pretty terrifying/ awe-inducing when an Andalite of all things stepped forward. He introduced himself as Ilraen-Aroline-Fothergill and told me I was in a place called the Protectors of the Plot Continuum Headquarters. Normally, I'm not the kind of person who goes around fainting, but I'll admit, I kind of passed out at that point.

I woke up in what looked like a hospital (Medical) and the guy in charge, Doctor Fitzgerald, told me I'd just experienced temporal-spatial displacement nausea. It's apparently something pretty common for newcomers. After Doc made sure I wasn't experiencing any after-effects, he told me I could go home, but I asked him if there was anything I could do to stay. I mean, an actual Andalite in the cafeteria? Surely there was more stuff to see!

Doc seemed a little hesitant, but he said the PPC could always use more agents. Agents for what?

Almost anything you can think of. There are agents who kill things called Mary-Sues, agents who exorcise something called 'slash demons', agents who fix geographical mistakes, agents who separate poorly-crossed continuums- and they all serve to protect the multiverse.

That's right- THE multiverse. All those stories, movies, tv shows, and video games are all real inside their own universes, but badfic authors like to screw with the worlds, requiring PPC agents to go in and set things right.

I'll admit, I've written some fanfiction before, and while it's not the best, I did try to keep things as close to canon as possible when I was writing. Thank god, because I'd hate to be one of those people who helped ruin the continuum of Harry Potter.

Apparently the DMS (Department of Mary Sues) is always in need of more agents, so I immediately volunteered. Doc sent me to see the head of Personnel, a giant telepathic daisy named the Marquis de Sod. Honestly, I'm not weirded out by anything at this point, which is good, considering that my new boss is another telepathic plant named the Sunflower Official.

Since time flows differently in HQ, I should be able to get home at the same time I left, so I'm not worried about mom and dad freaking out over me suddenly going missing. I'm going to need some new clothes after too long, though... hmm...

Anyway, the Marquis got me set up in my current location, Response Center 3-Apple-14 (seriously, that has got to be the best RC number EVER) and gave me a 'flash patch' for the DMS. I don't know why it's a potted cactus- maybe a talking cactus was the original department head?

Tomorrow- or whatever the equivalent here is- I'm going to ask if I can have my friend Randa as my partner in Sue Slaying.

I got up this morning thinking I would have to take a math test. I'm going to sleep as a new protector of the multiverse. How cool is that?!


rina_dives: (Default)

June 2015

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